Abandonment and loneliness

𝗠𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘄 𝟮𝟲:𝟯𝟴‭ 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺, “𝗠𝘆 𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗹 𝗶𝘀 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗳𝘂𝗹, 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵; 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝗲.”

…

𝟰𝟬 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗶𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝘀𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗣𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿, “𝗦𝗼, 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗿?”

Jesus’ request of Peter, James and John was both for their benefit and his. He appealed to their overcoming future temptation – a good reason for prayer for anyone. But Jesus also wanted their company because of the personal ordeal he knew was coming. He wanted his friends to keep vigil with him.

Surely, being abandoned was part of Jesus’ suffering. On the cross he later quoted David’s psalm, saying “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Psalm 22:1). Anyone who has suffered knows that having someone present can make a big difference. It was part of the reason the writer of Hebrews would say that believers do not have a High Priest who’s unable to sympathize with our weaknesses (Hebrews 4:15).

“Abandonment issues” stem from parental negligence. A person with a pattern of being left alone – by people whose role and job it is to be there for them – is very sensitive to any situation where s/he lacks company when it’s needed or desired. Yet, this is a situation where Jesus can provide company, for he knows what it’s like. It’s unavoidable to feel abandoned at some point – there are things we must go through alone.

Providing companionship for the suffering – aka the ministry of presence – is a powerful testimony to the presence of God. May I listen to God’s voice and provide that when prompted, knowing just being there speaks love.

And should I find myself in an abandoned or even lonely state, let me know Jesus went before me and will NEVER abandon me through the Holy Spirit. His grace is sufficient.

The inner wash

Matthew 15:18-20 “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. These are what defile a person. But to eat with unwashed hands does not defile anyone.”

The “traditions of the elders” and nothing in scripture or the Law compelled the Jewish leaders to wash before eating.  It’s certainly not a bad idea but the compulsion is overplayed.  It was a point of compliance forced on the people by those who “knew best”.  Except, they did NOT know best.

Jesus’ description of what comes out of the mouth – in words which turn into deeds – is a list of depraved output that brings people into their worst state.  They reveal something very broken inside and that brokenness dwarfs any hand-washing or external action to cleanse the skin or extremities.  A good adage is “you can’t wash your heart”, because only God can do that.

The call is to integrity – to be the same person outside as inside.  It means acknowledging the ugliness and filthy thoughts within and allowing God to heal and cleanse.  It means not trying to look good (or look bad) or compelling others to look good.  As the evil-doer, adulterer and murderer and then heart-broken King David said:

Psalm 51:6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.

For it is not merely delusional to hide what’s inside, it’s deadly.  As David had ceased doing (though he knew better), let me let God do this:

Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

It is a sign of saving faith that I allow the light to shine even on my most shameful parts.

Drivers and leaders

𝗝𝗼𝗵𝗻 𝟭𝟬:𝟰 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝘄𝗻, 𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝗳𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 𝗵𝗶𝗺, 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲.

In the 10th chapter of John’s gospel, Jesus spoke of himself as the good shepherd. And he described what that meant. In this verse, he spoke of how a shepherd leads his flock. They go nowhere he has not been before them. Nor are they left in silence without a voice to follow.

In sheep tending there is both a time to drive the sheep forward and a time to have them follow. Both modes of movement have their place and there is no difference in the caring heart of the shepherd. But in human relations, drivers of people use motivational means that belittle, shame and coerce. Leaders only ask people to follow and learn to trust their course of action and motives.

There was only ever one perfect shepherd; yet the model he set forth for leaders are clear. Nor was the contrast between his brand of leadership and that of the religious rulers who opposed him.

This has deep application.

I have grown weary and suspect of the driving leaders of this world. Industry and the corporate world will celebrate the achievements of such people – that their relentlessness with vision, goals and even people is at the heart of their superior success. Even as I may use the inventions and products from their years of reign and rule, I know well that the system that vaunts their style gives short shrift to leaders who nurture creativity and diligence in those under them in authority while producing people as well as things.

Corporate and ecclesiastical structure and values both tend to support driver/leaders; just the truth. The term “reports” has been fitted onto people under them as if their only role in life is to show pre-scripted progress. At all costs they will present evidence of doing well against expectations – even fabricating such evidence; for to not do so endangers their livelihood. (although that livelihood is actually in constant danger from the driver).

It is no compromise to accomplishment or mission or schedule to foster growth; the best leaders constantly work themselves out of their jobs. Servant/leaders who help their followers neither leave a wake of the wounded nor fail to make forward progress.

We are all invited to find shepherds in our lives who go before us instead of driving us from behind.

Suspended understanding

John 6:56-58 Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever.”

Many disciples ceased to follow Jesus after he said these words. It’s also clear if those who remained did not understand what Jesus was saying either, but they clung to him nonetheless because, as Peter said “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life” (verse 68).

The analogy of bread to Jesus’ body and wine to his blood is a reference to his sacrificial death for all humankind, as demonstrated in Luke 22:19 and as practiced during communion services across the world in a vast variety of ways and churches. It is a tangible reminder for Jesus followers to signify saving faith in Jesus’ death for their sins.

We have no record of the lives of those who walked away in misunderstanding this saying. But it’s certain that NO ONE understood it, so those who remained did not let their understanding dictate their faith. As Peter went on to say: “We believe and know that you are the Holy one of God.” (verse 69). Who Jesus was matter more than their grasping everything he said or did. Indeed, it could be said that they were confused most of the time.

Can I suspend understanding like that? Can I push through confusion and lack of understanding of the “how’s” and “why’s” and “what’s” and cling to the person of Jesus? It takes faith to know it will all be clear at some point. But if I know the “who”, I can float the the other unknowns. For I do eat the body and drink the blood, knowing fully what it now means.

This is not to say everything I might hear is the voice of the Lord. Truly, following the wrong human voice can be the blind leading the blind. But when a word has strong spiritual witness in the Holy Spirit, I can know it’s him and follow it on that basis alone. It’s required to “Test everything. Hold on to the good.” (1 Thessalonians 5:21) and the good things need my attention as a follower.

So be it.

Expensive worship

Mark 14:4-5 There were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment wasted like that? For this ointment could have been sold for more than three hundred denarii and given to the poor.” And they scolded her.

At the house of Simon the (former) Leper, a woman had come forth and poured some very expensive perfume on the head of Jesus. It was a personal as well as public display of affection, devotion and honor. From the container used to the fragrance it emitted, everything about the action testified to fine, expensive quality of the liquid.

Immediately some who were present had attitudes about the woman’s actions. They thought it a foolish, wasteful thing to do. The value of the perfume would have brought in significant monies to be given to help the poor. It was never their perfume, yet they seemed to claim it with their high brow charitable concerns. And by inference, they both demeaned the woman who made the offering and Jesus Himself, who received it.

Attempts to control and manipulate the actions of others are deeply arrogant and insulting. Projecting attitudes and inferiority onto others has the appearance of establishing authority and dominance of them, but it reveals a poverty of soul and often has a basis in shame. Jesus very quickly defended the actions of the woman as being devoted and prophetic. His words “The poor you will have with you always” in no way discounted charity, but pointed to the singularly appropriate nature of the pouring of the perfume.

Part of the reason for donations being kept private is to avoid this very second-guessing and accusatory judgment of those who want to decide for everyone how things are done. But when such things are NOT private, unless I am asked, let me not interject opinions or even principles of how I would do things, let alone cast judgment on the hearts of others in how manage their resources.

The breadth of ways people worship God is mine to observe in deep wonder, not to control or manage. He is worthy of it all.

Joy rekindled

John 20:15-16 Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?” Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.”

Mary of Magdala had come to attend to the dead body of Jesus. She had witnessed his brutal death at the hands of the Romans, all the while being jeered at by those who opposed him and his ministry. She was traumatized and seared with grief. This was a personal time to say good-bye to one who had saved her life.

To discover the body missing would only add to her despondency. When Jesus approached her, she did not recognize him (many did not know the risen Christ until it was revealed to them). So her question was one of desperation, from the tenderest of hearts. In her mind, likely any number of things could have happened to the body, among which was the fact that the tomb was that of a rich person and NOT a place the body of someone like Jesus would have been laid to rest.

When she offered to “take him” it meant collect his remains from wherever they had been moved (likely discarded like rubbish) and at least provide Jesus the best resting place she could afford or arrange. Mostly, she just wanted to see him again.

The gardener would immediately identify himself, greeting her by name after these words and her sorrow turned to bubbling joy as Jesus had predicted. She was, then, the first person to see Jesus after his resurrection. And she couldn’t contain herself, telling the other disciples what she’d seen. In other accounts it says that her words seemed like foolishness to them – a common take on excited speech (slow down, Mary). Where is their grief in my life, where is there fresh or residual sorrow? Where have I left a situation as desperately unsolvable and frozen in that dissolution or brokenness? I am right – I will not solve anything. But I am wrong if I adopt hopelessness as final. It is NOT hopeless. God DOES resurrect, He DOES give new life and revives dead things. While it will never be the same, it may well be better.

Do I allow hope to arise? Do I consider that the “gardener” will call my name, as one in whom he has planted the seeds of salvation which push up a mighty tree from the soil? Awake my soul

Freedom of expensive worship

Mark 14:4-5 There were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment wasted like that? For this ointment could have been sold for more than three hundred denarii and given to the poor.” And they scolded her.

At the house of Simon the (former) Leper, a woman had come forth and poured some very expensive perfume on the head of Jesus. It was a personal as well as public display of affection, devotion and honor. From the container used to the fragrance it emitted, everything about the action testified to fine, expensive quality of the liquid.

Immediately some who were present had attitudes about the woman’s actions. They thought it a foolish, wasteful thing to do. The value of the perfume would have brought in significant monies to be given to help the poor. It was never their perfume, yet they seemed to claim it with their high brow charitable concerns. And by inference, they both demeaned the woman who made the offering and Jesus Himself, who received it.

Attempts to control and manipulate the actions of others are deeply arrogant and insulting. Projecting attitudes and inferiority onto others has the appearance of establishing authority and dominance of them, but it reveals a poverty of soul and often has a basis in shame. Jesus very quickly defended the actions of the woman as being devoted and prophetic. His words “The poor you will have with you always” in no way discounted charity, but pointed to the singularly appropriate nature of the pouring of the perfume.

Part of the reason for donations being kept private is to avoid this very second-guessing and accusatory judgment of those who want to decide for everyone how things are done. But when such things are NOT private, unless I am asked, let me not interject opinions or even principles of how I would do things, let alone cast judgment on the hearts of others in how manage their resources.

The breadth of ways people worship God is mine to observe in deep wonder, not to control or manage. He is worthy of it all.

The need to slow down

Luke 10:40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

Martha was a great hostess. If you were to have a party and wanted everything to be set up, clean, beautiful and functional, she was the person to make it so. Now there are basically two motivations for activity like that – 1) fear of what others think and might say and 2) an attitude of loving service. I think we see enough of Martha’s words and actions to conclude her motivation was fear. And she wanted others to enter into that fear – specifically Mary her sister. She wanted Jesus to exert His authority to force Mary to help her in her frenetic work. Her words even accused Jesus of not having correct motives – “don’t you care?” – as if her heart was in a better place than the Lord of glory.

It’s important to see that Jesus didn’t condemn Martha. He didn’t slam her with biting criticism that laid bare her vain heart. He instead gently pointed out that Mary was acting on better motivation than Martha. Mary wanted to hear from Jesus and that was more important than a house out of order or unprepared dip or finger food. It’s not that preparations didn’t have to be made and visitors didn’t have to be served – they did. It was just the attitude and rush that Martha had and wanted everyone else to have that needed confrontation. The food prep could wait – why not have the guests even help?

Do I demand that others join me in my anxious wranglings? Do I ask God to assign worry warts to surround me and help me? Do I even fret the small stuff, forgetting that I only need to chill and then I will find Jesus giving me all I need?

The message is simple yet hard to receive and practice – slow down! I mean I am paid to go fast, and faster still. I am compensated to be impatient – I’m not inventing that, just doing what my occupation calls for. Yet Jesus interrupts all of that, telling me this other relaxed one has chosen the better portion. Why am I working so hard? Why so fearfully? Let me hear the rhythms of God this day and pace myself, taking moments off to pray and breathe in grace. I need this real time – in the middle of things. And I need this at the beginning – as I prepare for the day. Bless the Lord O my soul.

Invitation to the kingdom of joy

Scripture;

Matthew 4:17 From that time Jesus began to preach, saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.”

Observation:

In the chronology of Matthew’s gospel, this one-verse account of the activity of Jesus cites a commencement. He began saying something and given the events that preceded – the trial in the desert when Satan himself and in vain tried to get Jesus off-topic and off-mission – this signifies a progression in his life on earth. The message he began proclaiming is one of urgency and calling. So often the “r” word – repent – is taken to mean a somber reflection of one’s shortcomings and sorrow-filled wallowing in deep regret. Such a state has very few positive outcomes and makes an even worse commandment if taken as a way of sentiment and conduct meant a life’s direction. No, repentance in the Greek means to change direction, of mind, perspective and yes, behavior. Jesus’ use of the word is best considered as an exhortation to something better than the listener/reader had before.

And for those who ask the often-arresting question “Why?” there is a definitive answer – “for the kingdom of heaven is at hand”. For those who have decided to be non-spiritual and to those whose spirituality is/was duty without apparent effect, the “kingdom of heaven” is an imminently available state of indwelling, a signature, ongoing experience of spiritual presence and one of keep joy to its possessors. This sounded (and sounds) especially spooky to those who have never opened personal spiritual doors, but Jesus’ “repent” speaks directly to the combination of fear and obstinacy and pride that keeps those doors shut, locked and barred.

Application:

Do I apprehend the present kingdom of heaven? Do I make it mine? Do I need to change my mind and perspective, to align it once again to all Jesus has for me? I confess that there is a dulling of spirituality that is the specialty of this world and its cares, and that I have let that direct me at times. But praise God for the reminders like this one!

Also, do I make the kingdom of heaven something that’s opposed to me? Not that I inherently walk in its direction and thus, need some adjustment, but that its intentions are at their base, out to humiliate and shame me, pull me down and expose me? If so, I must remember the cloak on the Prodigal Son, put across his shoulders by his father, and how much it covered up. I am by no means immune to sin or its progressive destruction in and around me. But the kingdom of heaven, by very nature, undoes its work and builds over what is torn down and destroyed. Let me see that vitality and embrace its work.

Do I take inventory of the good stuff? If so, I will end up with a jaundiced eye, jaded by all who would take credit – including myself – for the great things that happened and will in the future. Where does every good and perfect gift come from? Not from the impotent, faltering hand of people but from one far stronger and more benign than we could ever imagine. That is the kingdom of heaven in action and that must be what I notice and remain in thanksgiving for.

Prayer:

Short though it is, this verse both brings me back and sets me on course. Thank you for preaching about then enacting the very kingdom you spoke of. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Two complementary views

Scripture:

Revelation 1:17-18 When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. But he laid his right hand on me, saying, “Fear not, I am the first and the last, and the living one. I died, and behold I am alive forevermore, and I have the keys of Death and Hades.

Observation:

The prophetic vision known as the book of Revelation was recorded by the Apostle John while exiled to the Patmos, a small island in the Aegean Sea.

What he saw and wrote were perceived and recorded under the presence and inspiration of the Holy Spirit. He saw and heard Jesus Christ speaking about the churches in Asia and about the end times which were to come. In this passage, John has seen the glorified Christ for the first time. He had known Jesus personally and intimately during the 3-year ministry recorded in his gospel. John was certainly part of the inner circle of the closest disciples to Jesus. He cited himself as the disciple Jesus loved as he reclined very near to him at the Last Supper (John 13:23). And yet, in this passage, the presence of Jesus inspired no such familiarity. Falling as though dead signified the unworthiness of one to even be present. But the words of the Lord were immediately restorative – “Fear not”. Then, in quick succession, Jesus provided some identification – that He was indeed divine, for His existence was from eternity past and extended to eternity future (that is, His presence on earth was a tiny part of it). And He cited the history of which John – that He had died and then risen forevermore, because he was “the living one”. And also, He had taken the keys to Death and Hades – the dominion of evil reigned over by the Evil One.

Application:

The two views of Christ are vital for all humanity. For those who see only a transcendent figure, one “out there” who would have very little to do with present life, His life on earth as one who embraced the human condition and yet was not overcome by it provides a picture of One who cares every day for every person in every situation. There is no earthly place or circumstance that is too low or high to make His love and intimate interaction inaccessible. For those (like me sometimes) who would only welcome an intimate, immanent Savior who would tolerate and indulge their every thought, word and action, One whose presence – in all propriety – commands full-body prostration is on display. There word “respect” as applied to human authority is perhaps the basic link for some to understand such a presence, but it such a paltry excuse for the dare-not-speak awesome reverence John exercised. These two pictures provide a view of Savior Who is ever available for us at either end of the spectrum but whose existence must include both in the eyes and hearts of those who would come to him.

And then there is the power displayed in the historical gospel. Both in the observed miracle of a resurrected life and the spiritual conquest in stealing the very keys to the kingdom of darkness, Jesus is the one who provides salvation.

Prayer:

Father, thank you for these pictures. Let me know them and walk in their revelation. Amen.