Acts 16:20-21 They brought them before the magistrates and said, “These men are Jews, and are throwing our city into an uproar by advocating customs unlawful for us Romans to accept or practice.”
In Philippi, there was a slave who told the future. Her masters made money from her gift, though it was not a gift at all but a spirit that was working through her. When Paul and Silas went into the city and were preaching the gospel, she followed them around, incessantly saying “ These men are servants of the Most High God, who are telling you the way to be saved.” While this could initially be seen as encouragement, after several days it got old and so annoyed Paul that he cast the spirit out of the slave and she became incapable of fortune-telling.
Her owners were infuriated, so they rabble-roused a crowd and came before the authorities with the charge above. It is very important to note that their charge had NOTHING to do with their underlying conflict. The charge was only effective in gaining an angry crowd to go along with them, making a strong enough accusation to ensure the punishment of those who they felt had stolen from them.
This shows the structures and tactics of conflict. The inner motives of aggression and vengeance are such powerful drivers that the origin of the argument is quickly lost. Once this happens, lies and contrived accusations become the norm. Woe to the judge or magistrate to make sense of what is said or done. Teasing the truth out of such an atmosphere requires both wisdom and strong conviction, neither of which might be present.
But I am the judge of such conflict in my own life. I can see the mechanisms working, conjuring up reasons to justify my position which have nothing to do with the deeper hurt or injustice. Let me pray to uncover those base reasons and deal with them at the core of my soul, in prayer then in heartfelt communication with my offender(s). Whatever their response is, let me at least be in touch with what’s really going on in me. May I cut short the contriving schemes my clever mind hatches and simply forgive, grieve and move on.
And when conflict is brought before me, either as the accused offender or the judge, let me learn to discern what is really going on. Let me ask deep questions that have nothing to do with the surface charges and insinuations, for they are craftily constructed veneers over the pain that is really the issue. Then, learning where the true hurt lies, let me apologize, make amends or do justly according to what would acknowledge it, re-establish empathy and heal.
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